oh darkness abate
retreat and leave me as wounded
leave me not as I am
but as i once was

repeal this desperate dependence
on who or what can’t deliver
wholeness and peace is all i seek

seek but for some attention
some real true affection
and appreciation of who I am trying to be-but failing

what person can supply
what i don’t believe
is truly meant to be mine

given with the best of intentions
even with the best of abilities
my shell won’t let me believe

condemned by God? i think not!
condemned by strangers and friends
constantly reminded of my failings

hiding is in vain
what was mine not really
is more than really not mine in days light

immerse me spirit
drive this specter from my soul room
free my mind of desperation and depression

no where to run
oh lord no where
where is the wind to carry me away?

i can’t reach to son of God
to son of man
i can’t even lift my hand to praise

i am weary
i am as tired as my protests sound
to those who are driven away by this sadness

i hear ‘speak the word,
say the name
in the name there is freedom’

for all ears are turned
hearts have grown old and cold
even those who loved me are gone

for a moment i reach a healing truth
a moments reprieve
in the this sacred struggle to find these words

but still when i look up
i am here forlorn
in a desperate state of alone

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